10.31.2005

Commencement

I've been in therapy for almost exactly a year. Today, I kind of graduated. I mean, I think I did. I had mentioned during our last session that my insurance is changing and I would have to pay a lot more to come. Today, my last visit before the change, my therapist said she thought I should try life on my own. She said that I'm an above the line person, which I guess is a huge compliment, at least coming from a therapist.

What she meant is that there's this theory that we all spend our lives trying to stay above this line--life above the line is good and healthy but circumstances change, things happen and sometimes we slip below the line. A lot of people spend their time below the line blaming others or wallowing in their misery, etc., but others concentrate on getting back above the line when they fall below.

And that's me, I'm an above the line person. When I am down, I concentrate on getting back up. I don't blame others and I don't wallow. I take responsibility. This is a huge realisation--I admit it, I'm proud of myself. Because without even realizing it, I have a really healthy attribute! I didn't even notice this about myself, but God knows that Beth has listened to me talk long enough that she should know.

So afterward I went to 10,000 Villages and bought myself a ring. It's very pretty and made in Nepal--silver setting with a pink pearl. This will be my graduation present and when I look at it, I'll remember how far I've come. There's still far to go, but there's been progress and that's definitely something worth celebrating.

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